Many years ago, I had a girlfriend that I loved tremendously.  She was from California so whenever I think of the west coast, I think of her.  She was beautiful, intelligent, fun, and many other positive things.  But there was a problem.  She lied about everything. She stole. Eventually, I could not tell what was real and what was my imagination.

One day, because of my desire to survive, I forced distance between us.  When she found out that she had a terminal illness, she contacted me.  I listened to her stories for hours on the phone. The tears I cried were heartfelt.  Still, I kept my distance.  It felt safer.

How do you let go?  You resolve your own pain and sense of betrayal.  Carrying that pain around has got to be the worse form of self punishment ever invented.   My late lesson.  It was my own pain to resolve.  Expecting the other person to do it for me was not realistic.  The journey is to just work out your own stuff.  Figure out why you willingly participated in a damaging relationship. Own it and work it out.  i wish I had done that way earlier in the game.  

R.I.P

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